In today’s article I introduce you to the first language of Love: Affirmation Words.
Affirmation Words? What does this mean? One of the easiest and simplest ways to express our feelings and appreciation for someone is through words.
Words change lives and materialize whatever we want. With words, we can share with others our deep states of soul/mind. That’s the reason why we love so much literature and music.
Verbal compliments and gratitude words are powerful triggers when we talk about love.
Let me ask you one thing,
- How many times do you compliment your partner?
- How many times do you say thank you for the things he or she does to you?
- How many times you say “I love you”?
- How many times do you share your deep thoughts with your partner?
- How many times instead of being fully present with your partner your attention is somewhere?
- How many times do you turn off yourself from virtual activities to be only with your partner and listen to his/her ?
I’m not talking about fawning I’m talking about encouraging words. I’m talking about being in the present moment with the ones you chose to love.
With sincere words, we can inspire our partners to be better partners and better people.
In certain moments of life, we all feel insecure.
We may feel insecure because we are trying to find a new job because our partner doesn’t pay us the right attention or don’t ask us over the years what are our inspirations.
Yes, we should ask our partners what are their dreams and inspirations, because we change. With the right words, with the right tone, we can vanish our partner’s insecurities away.
Our partners may have some qualities and even desires that are asleep. Maybe the gift of your partner is waiting for your encouraging words to awake.
Remember, it’s encouragement, not pressure.
Why? Encouragement happens when your partner decides it’s time to give the first step, and so is the right timing where you have the opportunity to give your encouragement without it your words will seem like a judgment.
Many times what holds us back to attain something is the lack of courage.
Be the inspirational source for your partner. Be empathetic to his/her needs. Be authentic.
Only with empathy, we can see the world as our partner does.
Example:
Laura has been lately tired from work and would like to ask Garry to help her with kids and cook the dinner, but feels like he doesn’t listen to her.
Garry has been trying to lose weight and start his new book and feels no support from Laura feeling like she blames him all the time.
How can they change this situation and be more close to each other?
Laura can say: Garry, I had a horrible day today at work. Can you get ready kids for bed and give them dinner? I would love to spend some time alone with you to hear from you and share my thoughts.
Garry could say: Yes, sweetheart! I will do that for you and, I want to talk about what’s going on I may need your help. You are the only one I trust.
As we can see the way you ask something can change the final result.
Instead of saying: “You never do what I ask you to do!”
Say: “I know how much you care about me, can you do this favor for me, please? Thank you!
Instead of ignoring your partner and how he/she looks like, remember yourself to say to him/her:
- You look so handsome tonight I remember how excited I was to meet for the first time, you had the same shirt.
- I am so lucky to have such a woman like you by my side.
I know it may seem weird for you in the beginning, but in the long term, believe me, it will change completely your relationship and the way you look at your partner.
See you next article,
Alexandra Santos
Credits:
B&W Photo by Alexander Kliuchnyk
Ouso Escrever 