© 2020 Alexandra Maria Santos.  All rights reserved

Today we celebrate women’s day, but my message is for women and men who are out there trying to date and trying to establish a healthy relationship.

We all know dating in our days is confusing, or at least that’s the idea that somebody else tries to sell us, but if we look with attention around us, what we truly see is people terrified of falling in love and then being dumped/hurt. So most of the men and women play games with you because they like you and they want you to chase them because in this way they sense they have the control.

A large percentage of the population has this unconscious behavior, not because they are narcissists, players, or mean people. But because of their internal conflict, it doesn’t allow them to do the right thing.

So please, don’t react to their reactivity.

We, human beings, we all have this technology that helps us to discern what are the real facts and access reality. We call it intution because our body always knows what’s going on. When your gut tells you someone likes you, you are most of the time correct. But how long should you wait?

  • Set a time frame where you will help them to calm down, and where you remove romance from the equation.
  • Ask him or her what’s going on.
  • Be a source of reliability. 
  • Never forget what you want and what your needs are. 

Go with the flow goes nowhere!

Men and women don’t want to seem desperate or needy it is like a protocol they should follow because their peers said, their family said, their society said, and in the end, they lose their identity, voice, and people who truly love them.

Yes, some people will hurt you, use you, and disappear after sucked the life out of you. But is this the norm? No!


Fear is the common dominator of why most relationships end before they even began.

For you, woman:

  • Don’t have afraid to speak your truth
  • You want to get married and have kids, say it!
  • Know your mindset and your disposition
  • Know why you want a man and what qualities you look for
  • Why do you want a relationship?

For you, man:

  • Do you like her? Give her the green light
  • Do you want to hear her voice or send a message? Just do it!
  • Look after your reactivity and try to access why it happen.
  • You are a man, human being, you have real feelings, communicate those feelings without leaving assumptions in the air.

A final note, I would like to say that we all awake for love in different phases of our lives. Men, in general, have a different process to awake to love than women have because of all the imposed social restrictions to express it.

At the end of the day, as human beings, we need love and healthy attachment, so give it a fighting chance.

Wishing you love,


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4 comentários

  1. Great post. Happy Woman’s Day! Celebrated it with my wife yesterday. It is not that known in the US, but my wife is Russian so it is part of her holidays.

    You touch upon something so important beret. Speak your truth. We spend so much time trying to suppress and or repress emotions, they eventually become the core of nervous disorders. Love can be frightening, but it’s rewards far outweigh the possible consequences a hurt heart can create in the moment.

    With gratitude.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, dear Tom!

      It made me happy to read your commentary and know your wife is from Russia. I do believe international marriages and relationships are possible and very rich in many ways. Of course, there can exist challenges like language and cultural background, but if the couple wants it to work, it will with no doubt.

      Have a wonderful day 🙂



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