Lately, I have been writing a lot at the Ouso Escrever, but also I have been studying a lot. So the more I know, and educate myself, the more I want to share valuable information that you can use in your life.

The question I have today for all of us is: Who do I want in my boat during rough times? Men or women, who jump out when the first wave hits the deck? Or Men or women, who stand with me no matter what the adversity is?

Last week I signed my inheritance waiver towards the belongings of my father and my mother. I did it for myself, and because deep inside my heart, I felt it was the right time to end a cycle in which past generations almost killed each other for a simple piece of land. And for me, this is what really means the power of letting go.

I have been questioning myself lately a lot, what was the propose of the last three years of my life. And the immediate answer was: surrender, let go and move toward your real path.

Who am I? Where I want to be in 1, 3, 6 years? What do I want to do with my life and in life?

Who I want to have in my life? Weak people? People who don’t know what they want? Someone who throws the towel to the floor at the first sign of difficulty?

NO!

I took the last twenty years of my life educating myself for showing up fully to life and love, so why accept less when I want more? Why should I limit myself to what I already know, when deep within I need to spread my wings and fly away to see more and amplify my brain and heart?

I have to be sincere, I was attracting the wrong type of people to my life, and you know why? Because I was showing only one of my facets. The strong, resilient, amazing, and fashionable woman that lures the attention of the wrong people.

You may ask: why were they wrong, Alexandra?

Because although I am indeed strong, resilient, and a diva in my way. But what about the other side of me? The woman who needs emotional support? The woman who sometimes don’t want only hear others, but also want others to hear her?

I had to stop, go inwards, reboot my perception of my reality and think: ok this doesn’t feel good, what am I doing wrong? I was editing myself and that it was what I was doing wrong!

I was editing my emotions, my beliefs, and my reality to make others happy. And yes, they took me for granted. I never, ever, in my life needed validation from anyone else, so why now adjust and diminish who I am and what I want?
My life can end tomorrow, and I want to leave this experience with a good feeling inside me. So why not let go of what I knew would always be there? Why not let go of people and situations that don’t fit me emotionally and energetically?

“Getting unstuck requires being truthful with yourself about how you feel—still angry, sad, or anxious, even though you wish you weren’t—but holding out the possibility that someday you might feel better.”

I am glad it is over! I am happy because, with 35 years old, I am discarding what doesn’t belongs to me. I am saying goodbye and rewriting my narrative. I am repairing things where I can and not allowing anyone else to ask for more than I can give. Because I need my oxygen, I don’t need to rescue or save anything or anyone.

So what is a real letting go?

  1. An opening act for a new beginning
  2. Say goodbye to the status quo and delusions.
  3. Cut the cord with the very person, the very situation that was destructive in the first place.
  4. Anchor yourself in the Future
  5. Discard everything and everyone that doesn’t fit your tomorrow because you are working for your higher interests. 
  6. Repair what you can
  7. Transform your narrative, forgive, and be present.

Good judgment always comes from a place of experience. I am happy and proud of all the things I lived, and I am proud of the woman and the human being I will be tomorrow. Remember, we need to let other people face their decisions. We need to let them experience what they need to learn, even if it means their suffering and regrets.

The best gift you can give to someone or a situation is the pleasure and the cure of your absence. Not because you are mean, but because it is your right to move forward and take the reins of your life.

I am strong, resilient, kind, generous, grounded, beautiful, or sexy. But most importantly, I am who I am. And like it or not is all I have to give.

Enjoy your weekend!

Alexandra

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