Toxic women destroy good men, but we barely talk about them and the consequences of these relationships.
Surprisingly, there isn’t much information about this dynamic. When good men meet toxic women, and how these women and their behaviors change those men forever.

To change the outcome, we need to change the culture, and this means we have to understand what toxicity means, what we can accept or not. Tolerance for bad behavior will only lead to poor connections, fragile emotional boundaries, and unnecessary labels that fragment the already fragmental society.

If you are looking for a serious relationship and a woman to share your life with, please run away as fast as you can, from this type of women:

  1. The Social Media Addict: This type of woman has a heavy presence on social media platforms. She is on Facebook, Instagram, and other platforms all the time in search of validation, praise, and her cell phone is her best friend. If you go out on a date or you have a relationship with her, you may notice that she is always interacting with the cell phone. And publish whatever she is doing or faking doing. All this means she is never present in the moment or with you.
  2. The Selfie Girl: Published in The Open Psychology Journal, researchers from Swansea University and Milan university established that excessive posting of selfies is associated with a subsequent increase in narcissism by an average of 25 percent. Women take an average of seven shots to get one image, then comes edition, real-life alterations like changing the lighting or touching up makeup. Although selfies are silly, we have to recognize and accept the darker side of it when the selfie becomes a measure of self-worth, self-esteem, and the bridge for the elusive perfection. “The problem of selfies has even attracted the attention of various professional journals for plastic surgeons, which have been posting articles about increasing requests for plastic surgery coming from young people.”
  3. The Tinder Girl Checklist: This type of woman use dating apps to increase the number of followers that they have on the Instagram platform. Date or get to know you aren’t on their priority list. You are, in reality, just another face.
  4. The Instagram Bombshell: Everything is perfect about her. The perfect holiday in exotic places, with a waterfall bikini photo, because promoting her body is important. The flawless selfies with flawless makeup with specific descriptions or tags to attract more followers. If they are in a relationship, they may post pictures of you as a self-promoting thing and not really because they love you.
  5. The bitchiness behavior adept: This type of woman may try to introduce chaos if you are in a relationship with another woman. By sending you private conversations they have with other people about you, to try and see how strong your relationship is and if you are secure enough with your feelings. They aren’t either good friends or good lovers, not only because of the lack of emotional maturity, but also the disrespect of fundamental principals to behave with others and their extended relationships.
  6. The mysterious woman: Although mysteriousness, in the beginning, might be aphrodisiac, everything about this woman is a secret. She doesn’t reveal that much about her life because she is emotionally unavailable or doesn’t have a real interest to let you in, using you only for her loneliness and weak moments.
  7. The Gold Digger: The term “gold digger” refers to a woman or man who pursues a romantic relationship primarily for its material benefits, entering into a quid pro quo, more-or-less equal exchange of relationship for money or gifts.
  8. The Feminist: Heterosexual women and men are attracted to one another precisely because of their archetypical traits. The dynamic between the two sexes as teamwork was one of the foundations for our success as a species. So at the light of real understanding, the feminist legacy and patriarchy theory has created a cruel battle of the sexes and oppress women and men inside a cold war. What do we need? More hatred? No! We need balance and the understanding that women and men are necessary for our society. Of course, we need equality and rights and fight against abusive situations, but we don’t need to encourage hatred or extremist speech, and we should avoid these types of people.
  9. The Drama Queen: Tend to be unaware of their real feelings. Are usually overly concerned with physical attractiveness and dress in a sexually seductive manner. Drama queens share some features of borderline personality disorder, which is characterized by instability in identity and relationships. These people experience intense mood swings. “You often feel when you’re with them they’re terribly engaged with you and as soon as you’re out of sight, you’re out of mind.”
  10. The Princess Mentality: Suffering from Princess syndrome is more common than you may believe. A girl or woman who suffers from Princess Syndrome lives life or wants her life to be a fairy-tale. She may learn that she cannot be self-sufficient, and she has to rely on a savior or the prince with the white horse. Although she may appear as a fragile/inoffensive woman, her passive-aggressive and demanding behavior over time will make you feel drained and exhausted.
  11. The Controller: Controllers have low self-esteem needing to control people and situations. They believe they are unworthy of love operating in a defensive manner and out of fear in relationships. The need to win is present all the time, and these types of women are especially drawn to nice men. Nice and genuine good men offer kindness, acceptance, and support.
  12. The Flirty Girl: Flirting is not a trivial activity; it requires many skills: intellect, body language, creativity, empathy. However, flirt can predict damage consequences for your relationship if your girlfriend or partner engage in flirting activities with other male suitors and even go out on dates with them. Making you feel that you are wrong to contest her erratic behavior.
  13. The I’m Sexy and I know it: Although it is great to have self-confidence and self-esteem, I am talking about women that use their physical appearance not only to attract you but also to other men. Flaunting her body off, be it online or offline, reveals a deep lack of self-esteem, insecurity but also the hidden message I’m not enough.
  14. The Wishy-Washy woman: She may want you one day, but the next day she may be confused and overwhelmed by so many perspectives male partners. Maybe she doesn’t know what she wants, or she does know but wants to have you around until she finds something better. Do yourself a favor a find a consistent healthy woman to love you!
  15. The Daddy Issue Girl: If you are dating a woman with a father complex or daddy issues, unless she did the necessary healing work, it can damage your relationship because this woman never felt loved or enough for her father. These types of fathers were emotionally unavailable and left in their daughters an impressive void that they need to suppress in their intimate relationship. In intimate relationships, these women feel they have to be perfect and rarely argue or get mad. However, they become very disappointed when they discover that their prince charming, weren’t that charming after all.

It is important to understand that everyone can fall into a toxic relationship. And, also all of us experienced at some point in our lives a traumatic event. No one is perfect, and no one is a saint with an immaculate crown. But very few are willing to recognize they need help to overcome their internal issues and emotional voids. The father complex can damage women’s self-esteem, and I believe that most of the bad behavior that I presented here today has a direct link to that complex and lack of proper education.

The Father complex will be the subject of my next article because not all women who had and still have an absent father in their lives are broken. Plenty of them are emotionally healthy because they did the necessary healing work, but also had other father figures in their lives. I will give my personal testimonial.

With love,

Alexandra

References:
Child Mind Institute
https://childmind.org/article/what-selfies-are-doing-to-girls-self-esteem/

Glendora – Registered Psychologist
https://glenora.net/pleasers-and-controllers/

Father Absence, Father Deficit, Father Hunger, by Edward Kruk
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/co-parenting-after-divorce/201205/father-absence-father-deficit-father-hunger

Toxic Masculinity or Cultural Misandry? by Edward Kruk
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/co-parenting-after-divorce/201907/toxic-masculinity-or-cultural-misandry

Toxic Femininity: Is Acting as Fragile and Frivolous internalized misogyny? by Ritch C Savin-Williams
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sex-sexuality-and-romance/201908/toxic-femininity

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11 comentários

    1. Sometimes I wonder if we are looking at the right direction/people, or if our dating pool is getting smaller as time goes by.
      Anyway, I think people are so scared and traumatized with bad experiences that sometimes they have amazing individuals in front of them, but they don’t feel it because it can’t be the truth, or their subconscious programming doesn’t allow them to see it.

      Liked by 2 people

  1. This is really interesting and well written. I know that you utilizes resources, but did you create these 15 types? You mention they are to be avoided in dating, but have you found in a female-to-female friendship that there are certain types of these personalities that are harder to deal with? If you had to say which type you’re closest to, which would you pick?

    I’m going to bookmark this for future reference. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Joshua,

      Thank you for your commentary and interesting questions.

      These fifteen types of women that should be avoided are well documented but disperse in different psychology articles.

      “You mention they are to be avoided in dating, but have you found in a female-to-female friendship that there are certain types of these personalities that are harder to deal with?”:

      The hardest types of women to have a friendship are these: The social Media addict or the selfie girl. The bitchiness behavior adept, the Gold Digger, The Drama Queen, The Princess Mentality.

      Why? Although social media addictive usage and bitchy behavior seem to be nowadays accepted in our society and even glorify. The reality is that women who know what they want. And feel great in their skin, don’t waste their time with these types of toxic women. Healthy women want to be surrounded by people that can add something wonderful to their lives, not unnecessary drama.

      I had in the past “friendships” with females that have princess mentality and drama queens, which are a pain in the ass. They talk with you about their problems all the time, but they don’t change their circumstances and don’t hear your suggestions either. So, after a while, you start to pull away from these people.

      The bitchiness behavior adept, for me, it is what I call emotional predators, and I can smell them miles away. These women have deep-rooted insecurities and play all sorts of crazy games to attract men or validation from men even if they are in relationships. But it will only be a problem if that man doesn’t stand up for his woman and even allow and finds funny the bitchiness behavior.

      I am glad the Oxford Men’s rights action – Toxic Female Behavior pyramid made it visible.

      Have a lovely day 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Eh… I say that there are only 2 types of women in this world…

    1. There’s the lady. She is someone with restraint, with observance, and with caution. She does not give in so easily to temptation. Many people will think her unable to dash in the direction of infinite choice. She knows the world is there, though she doesn’t need to eat it whole.

    2. There’s the woman. She is simply a woman. And, through her lack of intelligence, restraint, and perception skills, she uses more of her ears, over her eyes. She wants everything, when it simply says to her it is good. She plays with everything. She never uses her eyes to see what a man wants, as she always uses her ears to hear someone calling. Then, she falls into traps, from those calls.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The first part of your commentary reminds me of this song, which I love:

      I would say that men tend to lose time with the woman, and when they meet the lady, they don’t know what to do and scare themselves or lose the momentum, but that will be a conversation for another day.

      Thank you for your commentary 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Another great and informative post, Alexandra.
    Now I’ just wondering how many people (not just women) exist that don’t fit at least a little in one of these categories. Is the “perfect world” (or better – really well balanced people) just our illusion?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am a true believer that you have plenty of healthy people in this world. The difference between healthy and unhealthy people is that healthy individuals overcome the harsh events of life, without feeling the victim and also with more tools to live life in peace.

      They have dreams and hopes. They are alive.

      Have a lovely weekend 🙂

      Gostar

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