Never remain in situations if it can damage your core values and worthiness. Love is a school where you have to be brutally honest ready to give and receive lessons because only this way will growth happen.
“All children of narcissists suffer. Sons of narcissistic mothers suffer damage to their autonomy, self-worth, and future relationships with women.”
Forgiveness is powerful but before advising it to anyone or even you decide to forgive someone, think about the diversity of injuries and how you or the other person you are counseling is feeling. We need to call people out and stop being a society of conniving where in the blink of a blind eye, people are hurt constantly. The only way development and social equality will happen by starting to call people out because of their bad actions. But also by stepping into the role of being an active citizen. And this can’t happen by silent your voice.
Although the word toxic is becoming a usual label everywhere and for everyone, we should be careful not only to use it. But also correctly identify what is toxic by running away from it or avoiding altogether in the first place.
Head games or yo-yo relationships are a typical example of toxicity in the dating/intimate universe.
“A lasting marriage means learning to live in the truth of broken promises.”
“We are most helpful to women in other countries when we are a model of change, when we share organizational strategies, help call international attention to abuses, lobby for international organizations to classify violations of women’s rights as human rights violations, contribute money to their gender equality campaigns, respond to their “action alerts,” compare stories of struggle, and respect their right to be the architects of their own change. We are least ineffective when we try to tell them what they must do and how they should do it as we don’t usually understand the relevant cultural contexts.”
Shawn Meghan Burn, Ph.D
“Some people will disapprove of you, of course. No matter who you are, some people will disapprove. Oftentimes, such people are in the business of looking down on everyone. They judge everybody unfavorably because of their own emotional needs. They will consider some people not well-enough educated, or from the wrong background, or too something or other—not classy enough for them, perhaps. Such a person—even if he or she is a family member—is not worth paying attention to.”
By Fredric Neuman M.D.
“Distractions are not just frustrating; they can be exhausting. By the time you get back to where you were, your ability to stay focused goes down even further as you have even less glucose available now. Change focus ten times an hour (one study showed people in offices did so as much as 20 times an hour), and your productive thinking time is only a fraction of what’s possible. Less energy equals less capacity to understand, decide, recall, memorize, and inhibit. The result could be mistakes on important tasks. Or distractions can cause you to forget good ideas and lose valuable insights. Having a great idea and not being able to remember it can be frustrating, like an itch you can’t scratch, yet another distraction to manage.”
“Resilient individuals find a calling and dedicate themselves to what gives life purpose. Pursuing a meaningful purpose may involve stress and pain in the short run but over the long run brings meaning (e.g., raising children, seeking personal growth, training for a marathon). People with a sense of purpose feel less anxiety and stress (Hagerty, 2016). As Nietzsche remarked, “He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.”
Shahram Heshmat Ph.D.
The keys for female sexuality are “responsive female sexual desire” and valuing sensual, playful, and erotic scenarios in addition to intercourse. The new mantra emphasizes that sharing pleasure and eroticism is more important than individual sex performance.
Satisfaction certainly involves orgasm but is much more than orgasm. Satisfaction involves feeling good about yourself as a sexual person and bonded as a sexual couple. This mantra allows women and men to have a shared language.”
“We sometimes go in and out of relationships and not really know (or understand) what’s getting in the way. What makes some relationships click and others not so much, or why we or someone else walks away or refuses to. It’s important to look at what WE bring to the table.”
Vijayeta Sinh Ph.D.
“In the run up to International Women’s Day last week, the Diversity Council of Australia (DCA) published a list of 8 common myths about workplace sexual harassment. One of these myths is the belief that sexual harassment only happens to straight women, when in reality it happens to people of all genders and sexual orientations.
According to report by Rebecca DiGriolamo in the The Advertiser (Adelaide), nearly 1 in 2 complaints of sexual harassment accepted by the commission in 2017/2018 were made by men.
Sexual harassment against men at work is more common than most people think. Research by the Australian Human Rights Commission has found that 23% of women and 16% of men experienced sexual harassment at work in Australia in 2018.”
by Australian Men’s Health Forum
Like cognitive neuroscience teach us, when it comes to intimate relationships, we should choose “boring” and not “over the top” candidates. Not because we are picky or mean, but because “the spark” isn’t necessarily a good thing or a reliable source of information if someone will be the right partner for you. “Chemistry” is a cocktail of lust and danger that wrings the dopamine out of your neurotransmitters.
“It is critical to understand that sensitivity is a temperament—an aspect of personality, such as introversion or extroversion, which is believed to be innate rather than learned. It has been estimated that 15 to 20 percent of the population has a Highly Sensitive temperament. It occurs about equally for men and women. Being an HSP is not considered to be a disorder or malfunction. Unfortunately, in spite of being a significant percentage of the population, HSPs are still not well understood, and their particular challenges are not often recognized.”
Dianne Grande Ph.D.
The beautiful art of flirting helps us to realize our insecurities towards other’s approaches, destroy emotional barriers, and believe that exists, beautiful people in this world.
“It’s important to recognize why one is single, whether being single is a choice or arises from unconscious factors (and if so what those factors are likely to be), to what extent social influence plays a role in relationship status, and, if partnered, whether one is genuinely interested in being in a relationship. As stigma about singlehood decreases, more people will end up being single, more people will choose being single out of a secure attachment style, and (hopefully) fewer people will be partnered or single for the wrong reasons. Models of secure singlehood will become more defined socially, better understood psychologically, and happy single people will be able to live openly, without having to deal with bias.”
Grant Hilary Brenner MD, FAPA
” Freud believed that all humans experience something he called “repetition compulsion,” which he saw as a biological need to repeat old behaviors. Neuroscientists have been finding evidence in recent years to back him up on this, suggesting that that neuropathways set themselves up in our brains and push us to keep doing the same behavior.”
F. Diane Barth L.C.S.W.
“The best partnerships might be an honest merging of ambivalences, two people who admit they each want conflicting things, a bunny and a buddy, brutal honesty and tactful kindness, and can laugh together about the predicament of trying to get that from one person for life.”
Jeremy E. Sherman Ph.D.
“Aging is a passage, one that doesn’t have to be a devolution, but a process of renewal and movement toward beauty, in all the ways we personally choose to define it.”
Holly Parker, Ph.D.
“In times past, men and women tended to meet at work, through mutual friends, or at social venues such as church or sports clubs. In other words, their relationship was rooted in a pre-existing social ecology where others could generally be trusted. This could inhibit contemptible dating behavior as wrongdoers faced opprobrium from the pre-existing community.
However, no such social ecology exists within the world of dating apps. On the contrary, some dating app users can hide under a cloak of anonymity or deceit. This can include deception about personal characteristics such as age or profession, as well as dishonesty regarding intentions.”
by Rob Whitley, Ph.D.