Never remain in situations if it can damage your core values and worthiness. Love is a school where you have to be brutally honest ready to give and receive lessons because only this way will growth happen.
“All children of narcissists suffer. Sons of narcissistic mothers suffer damage to their autonomy, self-worth, and future relationships with women.”
Although the word toxic is becoming a usual label everywhere and for everyone, we should be careful not only to use it. But also correctly identify what is toxic by running away from it or avoiding altogether in the first place.
Head games or yo-yo relationships are a typical example of toxicity in the dating/intimate universe.
“A lasting marriage means learning to live in the truth of broken promises.”
“Maslow’s hierarchy of needs and conventional wisdom both suggest that love is a fundamental human need. Most people meet their significant others through their social circles or work/school functions. However, these pools can be relatively shallow. In the search for a potential date, more and more people are switching to less traditional methods.
The popularity of online dating is being driven by several things, but a major factor is time. Online dating presents an effective solution to a serious problem.
Browsing profiles isn’t nearly as time-consuming (or daunting) as mixing with people in a social context. Statistics suggest that about 1 in 5 relationships begin online nowadays. It’s estimated that by 2040, 70% of us will have met our significant other online.
The problem with a lot of online dating applications is that they don’t really work. Before you throw caution to the wind and empty your wallet into the pockets of an online app with the reckless abandon of a love-struck teenager, there are a few things you should know.”
Ryan Anderson, Ph.D.
“Holding on to pain doesn’t fix anything. Replaying the past over and over again doesn’t change it, and wishing things were different doesn’t make it so. In some cases, especially when it comes to the past, all you can do is accept whatever it is you’re holding on to and then let it go. That’s how everything changes. You have to let go of what is hurting you, even if it feels almost impossible. Deciding to hold on to the past will hold you back from creating a strong sense of self — a self that isn’t defined by your past, but rather by who you want to be.”
Ilene Strauss Cohen Ph.D.
“By gradually re-involving ourselves with someone who is capable of being consistently caring, we are soothed. The pleasure and ease of the connection restore our hope and faith that had been battered. The comfort of a loving partnership bathes our hearts in loving-kindness. When at long last, we exchange love and care with someone who is safe, consistent, respectful, and fully present with us, the depth of appreciation of their trustworthiness heals our broken heart. Then we can live in gratitude for the love that has been hard-won.”
“Technology gives us a sense of control over our lives; basically, we’re able to hold our world in the palm of our hand. Since social media initiated more quantitative measures of “friends,” “shares,” and “likes,” human connection has become increasingly mechanized. This creates a distance from the actual person with whom we are interacting and can make a relationship more transactional than if we had to speak face to face. We may not even recognize the effect our behaviors have on others.”
Suzanne Degges-White Ph.D.
“People generally talk about manifestation as the process of using thoughts, feelings, and beliefs to bring something into reality, but given the science behind manifestation, ACTIONS are the key part of the manifestation process.”
Tchiki Davis, Ph.D.
“Erotic intelligence stretches far beyond a repertoire of sexual techniques. It is an intelligence that celebrates curiosity and play, the power of imagination, and our infinite fascination with what is hidden and mysterious.”
“Resilient individuals find a calling and dedicate themselves to what gives life purpose. Pursuing a meaningful purpose may involve stress and pain in the short run but over the long run brings meaning (e.g., raising children, seeking personal growth, training for a marathon). People with a sense of purpose feel less anxiety and stress (Hagerty, 2016). As Nietzsche remarked, “He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.”
Shahram Heshmat Ph.D.
The keys for female sexuality are “responsive female sexual desire” and valuing sensual, playful, and erotic scenarios in addition to intercourse. The new mantra emphasizes that sharing pleasure and eroticism is more important than individual sex performance.
Satisfaction certainly involves orgasm but is much more than orgasm. Satisfaction involves feeling good about yourself as a sexual person and bonded as a sexual couple. This mantra allows women and men to have a shared language.”
“We sometimes go in and out of relationships and not really know (or understand) what’s getting in the way. What makes some relationships click and others not so much, or why we or someone else walks away or refuses to. It’s important to look at what WE bring to the table.”
Vijayeta Sinh Ph.D.
“Sensuality is the ability to perceive sensations from something that happens to or comes into contact with your body. It is the quality and skill to get you there, be present and feel it fully. It means you actively inhabit your body. Sensuality is not only sensations of a sexual nature. Think about it.”
Adena Bank Lees, LCSW
“In the run up to International Women’s Day last week, the Diversity Council of Australia (DCA) published a list of 8 common myths about workplace sexual harassment. One of these myths is the belief that sexual harassment only happens to straight women, when in reality it happens to people of all genders and sexual orientations.
According to report by Rebecca DiGriolamo in the The Advertiser (Adelaide), nearly 1 in 2 complaints of sexual harassment accepted by the commission in 2017/2018 were made by men.
Sexual harassment against men at work is more common than most people think. Research by the Australian Human Rights Commission has found that 23% of women and 16% of men experienced sexual harassment at work in Australia in 2018.”
by Australian Men’s Health Forum
Like cognitive neuroscience teach us, when it comes to intimate relationships, we should choose “boring” and not “over the top” candidates. Not because we are picky or mean, but because “the spark” isn’t necessarily a good thing or a reliable source of information if someone will be the right partner for you. “Chemistry” is a cocktail of lust and danger that wrings the dopamine out of your neurotransmitters.
In times of so much online interactions and technology trance, we need emotional educators, people who are emotionally free from lobbies and patriarchal ideas. We need to educate our children and set them free from intoxicating ideologies and behaviors. We need people who are real people and women who can lead and show the way. Forgetting unnecessary and outdated feminism by rescuing the art of sensuality, and embrace the power that they can choose who they want, when, where, and how. And the lives they want to live also by stop being the Instagram shelf women.
“It is critical to understand that sensitivity is a temperament—an aspect of personality, such as introversion or extroversion, which is believed to be innate rather than learned. It has been estimated that 15 to 20 percent of the population has a Highly Sensitive temperament. It occurs about equally for men and women. Being an HSP is not considered to be a disorder or malfunction. Unfortunately, in spite of being a significant percentage of the population, HSPs are still not well understood, and their particular challenges are not often recognized.”
Dianne Grande Ph.D.
“It’s important to recognize why one is single, whether being single is a choice or arises from unconscious factors (and if so what those factors are likely to be), to what extent social influence plays a role in relationship status, and, if partnered, whether one is genuinely interested in being in a relationship. As stigma about singlehood decreases, more people will end up being single, more people will choose being single out of a secure attachment style, and (hopefully) fewer people will be partnered or single for the wrong reasons. Models of secure singlehood will become more defined socially, better understood psychologically, and happy single people will be able to live openly, without having to deal with bias.”
Grant Hilary Brenner MD, FAPA
“When you go through a breakup, especially one that’s unexpected, your body may register it as an emergency and go into “fight-or-flight” mode. Being in this state triggers the release of hormones that can prepare your body to stay and deal with a threat or to run away to safety. It can also trigger a rapid heartbeat or trembling.
Our muscles tense, we lose our appetite, we may experience [gastrointestinal] disruption, and we’re likely to have trouble falling asleep. Being in this physically hyper-vigilant state over a period of time can lead to headaches, stomachaches, and muscle soreness”
by Dr. Kristin Bianchi