Today is Women’s day. But what does it mean to be a woman? Is being a woman marasmus of conceptions that lead nowhere? Competition for the spotlight? I don’t believe in narcissistic theories. Being a woman is all about awareness, the internalization of the impactful roles that we play in our societies, families, and intimate relationships.
We are witnessing history repetition that was thought to be dead and buried, the bombardment of unnecessary information on social media and mass media. A profound disregard for our rights as humans and our civil integrity.
If you have found your person already, give them all the right reasons to stay because later can be too late.
According to Noam Shpancer (2014), “high status and very attractive women need less help and protection from other women and are less motivated to invest in other women (who represent potential competition). Thus, a woman who tries to distinguish or promote herself threatens other women and will encounter hostility.”
Emotional stable women won’t compete for men. In truth, it will be a turn-off, and they will leave without regrets even if the guy seems to be, at first glance, appealing. Stable women will invade your life with positivity standing by your side and reaching out with insightful conversations that you never had. “She’s the fire and the fallout. She reminds you of the things we never talk about. She’s the lover with the best-laid plan.”
You are here to live your experience to the fullest, not to be the clown of somebody else’s circus.
Adult conjugality requires focus, understanding, and time. Time to cement feelings of mutuality and companionship.
Endorse your sexuality and desire with no shameful thoughts. You slept with the Guy. OWN IT!
By removing your body and mind from what feels comfortable, you are opening new doors, new possibilities, and trust me, looking at kindhearted individuals will be a brand newish thrilling experience.
“Having boundaries doesn’t make you uptight. Feeling uncomfortable when someone overshares doesn’t make you an uncaring person. Everyone has boundaries. Acknowledging, setting, and protecting yours is a kind of self-care. When others recognize and don’t try to cross them, it is a sign of respect. Healthy relationships require sharing yourself with others, but they also require boundaries between what is a comfortable level of closeness and what is TMI.”
Andrea Brandt Ph.D. M.F.T.
My birthday. A message.
Psychologically structured individuals do not come from an easy life. But because with suffering, one grows.
Gladly I still see the sun rising. Gladly I am alive.
‘Saying goodbye allows us to put words to feelings, shape how we remember someone, codify our choices, and frame distinct periods of time. In short, goodbyes give us a sense of closure as we move into the next phases of our lives.’ – Jo-Ann Finkelstein Ph.D.
The last goodbye kiss, is this our goodbye?
You and I the forging force of lovers
with so much unsaid and undone.
I remember. I will remember.
Would it be better to assume that we have no education for love and, perhaps, help is needed?
We have at least 90 years of credits to live. Please, live it wisely without constrictions or thinking about if acceptance by peers will be granted. Do not ever take anyone for granted, and be sure that from them. You learned the best.
We are indoctrinated since a young age by movies, songs, and role models that love is an automatic response. That we must find the perfect person, the soulmate, “the one”, and everything will flow. We aren’t taught or teaching our children how to deal with frustration. Different points of view, general differences on how to approach daily life matters.
Sadly, the rule now is if there is a difference, then the other person isn’t the right fit for us.
Men and women are spending too much time online and not cultivating their relationships correctly. The other side of the coin is that now everything is allowed and normalized, leading to permissive behaviors and blaming the uncomfortable partner for calling out those behaviors.
Nothing is set in stone, and as adults, we can change our lives and relational dynamics to a better place. Lastly, as human beings, we are emotionally responsible for ourselves but also for our loved ones. Be kind to you, be kind to the ones you love or once were loved by you.